Homeless and Hopeless
April 6th, 2009
I know, I know. I disappeared for a while there. It has seemed lately that there is just not enough time in the day for all of my “projects”. I currently have 2 jobs, I dabble in affiliate marketing, I spend a lot of time surfing the traffic exchanges for various reasons, I am involved in some MLM programs, all in the effort of trying to “get mine”. There are a few methods that work, i.e. the “Power Surf Formula” (which is FREE to get started, by the way). While I am building SOME residual income, it is definitely not a get rich quick method.
Anyway, I know I have neglected my “audience” here for some time, and want to make up for it. I have a doozy here for today. People have expressed some interest in the fact that I was at one time “homeless”. Some want to hear the whole story, some do not believe me, and others want to know how I actually overcame that obstacle and have gotten where I am today. Well, I guess after reading this story, you can form your own opinion. Was it luck? The hand of God? Karma? Coincidence? Or whatever you believe in. All I know is, I got a 2nd chance. So here we go…….
HOMELESS & HOPELESS
OK, So how did it all happen? Well, right around the first of Dec. in ‘97 was when I had been fired from my job due to my “record mix up” in El Paso. I was a little embarrassed and ready to leave El Paso. I had decided to move to Houston, where my sister lived. I stayed with her for a few weeks until right after Christmas, during that time I looked for employment to no avail. I had thought that my ordeal had all been cleared up as promised, but for some reason I couldn’t even get a bite as far as employment went. I knew I needed to get out of her hair, not for her sake but it hurt my pride to be living off of her, especially while she was a newlywed with a new baby. Fortunately, some friends I had made while living in Norfolk, Va. had been in touch with me for a while and had offered to let me come back and stay with them until I could find a job and get back on my feet.
I said my good-byes on New Years Day, and took a Greyhound back to Va.. You see, I had already had my car repossessed, due to non-payment, so I really arrived back in Va. with all of my belongings fitting into my old Navy sea-bag. Talk about traveling light. After about a 3 day trip, due to bad weather, I finally arrived in Norfolk. The first few days were cool. We were all happy to see each other, and they had the satisfaction of “helping someone who was down and out”. I felt like I was with family.
Of course, while I was living there I was looking for a job. Once again, I just couldn’t seem to land anything. I knew I could get a job tending bar somewhere, but due to my hosts’ faith, I was not allowed to seek that type of employment, and still live in their house. I was, after all, better than that. I tried getting other jobs, but since I didn’t have a car, and (unbeknownst to me) I had a dirty “Criminal Background Check”, I wasn’t having any luck. Apparently, they found out somehow that I had applied for a few bartender gigs, and finally asked me to leave. To be fair, they had no idea about my situation (I really didn’t understand the magnitude of it myself). It had only been a few weeks but here I was a 25 year old man who couldn’t get a job, in their eyes. I graciously thanked them for trying to help, packed up my sea-bag, and hit the bricks.
I still had a few “old friends” in the area, so I figured I would be alright. I had about $40.00 in my pocket, and that was about all I had to my name. I initially stayed a couple of nights with a friend I had known for a while. He still lived with his parents and was hiding me out in his garage. After the second night sleeping in the cold, hard floor. I was awakened by a huge cockroach crawling across my face. Yuck! I asked if I could leave my stuff there, put some clothes in a shopping bag, and was on my way.
I then walked about 10 miles to another friends house. Stayed one night, and woke up to the sound of he and his wife fighting because he had some “homeless guy” sleeping in their living room. That’s when it all hit me that I was actually homeless. I asked if I could take a shower, and wash my clothes. He of course said yes, he actually was a good friend. I said my thank yous and good-byes then headed to the bus stop so I could get down to Virginia Beach. I was now down to my last few bucks, which I used sparingly, mostly for bus fare so I could get around town. I also had my “Big Gulp” cup for my 50 cent re-fills. You’ve got to be thrifty when you’re on the streets.lol
I found another old friend who lived in Va. Beach who let me crash for 2 nights before his wife started wanting money from me, which I didn’t have. Same old story. Then I was out of options. Through this final friend I met a gracious, old, retired gentlemen, who for some reason had a soft spot for me. While he and his wife had no room for “company”, he did let me stop by a few times in the following weeks to do some odd jobs for him. For which he would let me shower, feed me breakfast, wash my clothes, and give me 20 dollars. Then I would be on my way. I wish I could remember his name or even his exact address so I could go see him. But for the life of me, everytime I go back to that neighborhood, I can’t seem to pin-point his house, or street for that matter. Which is really strange considering my memory.
During these 3 weeks, I mostly just wandered around down at the Oceanfront. It was really cold, but I had a very heavy leather jacket that kept me warm in the daytime, and served as a blanket at night. I actually still have that jacket, I won’t part with it due to sentmental value, but my wife really hates it.lol. It really is ugly. Anyway, I kind of just depressingly existed during this time. I would use the money that “the gentleman” gave me for food and bus fare so I could go see him every few days when the money ran out. Occasionally, true to my “bum” standard, I would get myself a couple of 40’s of Malt Liquor beer. A couple of those, mixed with my situation, put some really bad thoughts in my head. That was a bad recipe for sure.
I don’t really remember alot about this time frame. I mostly was on my guard at all times. Afraid of being robbed by another “bum” for my jacket. I only slept whenever I could no longer hold my eyes open. Then I would find a bench on the boardwalk that wasn’t already taken. I did try a homeless shelter once when it was snowing. It was worse than jail, I decided I would rather take my chances on the streets. Then, finally, my luck changed.
It was 2:30am. Two and a half hours before, I had officially turned 26. I was on my favorite bench looking out at the ocean. It was about 25-30 degrees outside and raining. I was wrapped up in my jacket, and to be honest, I probably had more tears on my face than rain-drops. It was a pretty rough night for me, all things considered. I noticed an obviously innebriated man walking by. I still remember him in detail. He had on a black leather jacket, a dark braided pony-tail, a beard, jeans (Levi’s to be exact), and a wallet hanging on a chain that was attached to his belt loop. I couldn’t sleep anyway, so I decided to follow him. I don’t really know why, in my mind I wanted to protect him from a robbery, he looked like to easy of a target. I followerd him from a distance for what seemed like an hour. He had stumbled about 20 blocks down the boardwalk, then had turned into a neighborhood. After a couple of more blocks, he made it to a park. This park had public restrooms. He then laid down next to the restrooms and passed out. I was worried that he was going to get robbed, his wallet was actually laying beside him, still on the chain. I went and gingerly woke his drunk butt up. I said, ” Dude, you’ve got to get up and get it together. Someone’s gonna end up robbing you.” He looked around for a second, almost got his bearings, then passed back out. I awoke him again, telling him the same thing. He looked me dead in the face, said,”F@%^ YOU, Go ahead and take it.” Then he handed me his wallet and passed back out. I contemplated the situation, opened it up, and reluctantly took the $247.00 that was in there. I felt terrible, but, Happy Birthday to me.
I waited until the buses started running again, and took the bus back to Norfolk. I stopped in at the house where I had stayed just a few weeks ago to pick up a few things I had forgotten. Lo and behold, there was a birthday card there that my grandparents had sent me. Enclosed in the card was a check for $250.00. Which is really weird considering the biggest birthday gift I had ever received from them was $25.00. I then walked to my friends house where my sea-bag was stored (collecting roaches), picked that up. Then walked to a check cashing place to cash my B-day check. From there, I walked to a cheap flea-bag hotel, purchased a room and paid for two weeks in advance. Then I went grocery shopping. By two o’clock that afternoon, I had a job at a nearby night-club where I was to start the following day.
Within 2 weeks from that day, a bouncer from work (with whom I am still friends with to this day) offered to let me move into his spare bedroom. I lived there for about 6 months, until I got my own apartment. From there sooo much has happened, but to make this really long story come to an end I will say that 11 years later I live in a house that I own. I have a beautiful family, with a new addition on the way. And believe me I appeciate every bit of it. On my birthday every year I make sure to take the time to reflect on that birhtday in 1998, and how much the Lord has blessed me since then.
You’re probably wondering why I have chosen to share this somewhat shameful story. I really can’t say. I just feel that there might be someone out there who feels that things are hopeless right now, especially with this economy, and they might be considering giving up. I’m telling you right now that I have been there. Times have not been all peaches and cream since then, I can assure you. But what I can say, and know to be true, is that this too shall pass. You just have to push through it, and have a little faith.
AND for all of those who have helped along the way….. I thank, Love, and appreciate you all. If you know anyone who might be encouraged by this story, please pass it on.